Love came first and then the marriage came afterwards, but then when it does not work, you get a divorce. Yes, it sucks and you are not the only one going through something like this. In fact, for every 1,000 individuals, 6.8 get hitched and half of them go through a divorce. For both men and women, it is a difficult proposition and experience, especially when there is a court battle and there are children involved.
The man could also endure emotional pain and turmoil over the process of heading to a divorce. This is especially true when the man has been a devoted father and husband. A messy divorce will only make it worse for all parties involved, but the children are the ones that usually get hurt the most. If the spouses can come to a place of amicable understanding, it would make the situation so much better for everyone involved. However, that is not always the case.
Filing for the Divorce
If you are a married man and you have tried counseling and everything else imaginable to save your marriage and it is not working out, don’t be afraid to start the divorce proceedings. No matter which person files for divorce, the outcome is the same. If you are the one who files for divorce, your number one objective is not to lengthen the process, but try to let the system handle it in an expeditious manner by coming to a mutual agreement on all the issues that need to be worked out. If the woman files for the divorce, there is a good chance that emotions could be involved and the process may be drawn out longer than expected. Below are some suggestions for men in how to handle a divorce.
It is important to stay calm throughout the divorce process. A lot of the past will come to surface during the proceedings. Prepare yourself mentally and emotionally to deal with these issues. If you get angry in court and say something spiteful to your spouse, this could be perceived as a threat. You could find yourself with a restraining order, which would only complicate matters.
Social Media Abuse
Stay away from social media. Don’t take your dirty laundry to the Internet or show any photos of relationships you may have while going through a divorce. It can be used against you in a court of law, even if it is as innocent as you say.
Yes, you have a new girlfriend, which is quite OK, but don’t flaunt or parade her to your soon-to-be ex-spouse. Don’t include her in visits with your children and don’t attempt to get engaged while going through a divorce.
Be the first to volunteer to get out of the house. Yes, it will cost you to find a new place, but for your peace of mind, it is well worth it. However, don’t refrain from supporting your household just because you moved out.
Never hide money during a divorce because if you are discovered to be lying about your finances, the court could likely not believe you about your other assets. You will be branded as being a liar. So, be forthright when it comes to your finances.
The Bottom Line
While dissolution of marriage is difficult for everyone, it does not have to turn into a bad experience overall where everyone involved is fighting. It can be done smoothly and amicably. Doing it that way will only make the process simpler and faster.